Greetings my time traveling companions! We’re dusting off the ole Toychest Time Machine for a special trip back to 1994, a time when gross-out toys (you know, the ones that that squirted, oozed, “blurp’d,” and spewed) were on top. Combine that with the popularity of “pocket toys” like Polly Pocket and Mighty Max and what do you get? Well, thanks to the same twisted geniuses who gave us My Pet Monster and Madballs, we got… Body Wars.
Designed by Those Characters from Cleveland and produced by Toymax, Body Wars embodied (har-har) the same basic concept as Mighty Max (miniature playsets with a horror theme) and gave it a somewhat educational bent. The series consisted of six playsets (Hearty-Heart, Skull Skanner, Laser Lung, Eye-Liminator, Main Brain, Digo-Destroyer) that each represented a different part of the body.
Suitably graphic depictions of each body part, “each body part is a fighting fortress” defended by a tiny Health Hero from various Germ Warriors. In addition, on the back of each package, there was a brief explanation of the body part and what purposed it serves (see, educational!). It was a great concept—I could totally see these things combining Voltron-style to form one giant creature—that unfortunately seems to have gotten lost in the shuffle.
I’m not entirely sure where these were sold and I was unable to find any commercials online so I’m assuming the marketing campaign for these was virtually non-existent. You can find a few online thanks to services like ebay, though most go for “collector’s pricing” around $30.