Regardless of who or how old you are, there’s nothing quite like a nice bowl of cereal on Saturday morning. I mean, if even Pumpkinhead can enjoy a good bowl of Raisin Bran (see above) can’t we all? Its unfortunate, then that today’s culture forces us to condense our adult cereal fix into a breakfast bar or worse… powdered milk. Not only do we miss out on all the fun of getting to dig through those crunchy flakes and fluffy puffs of sweet, sugar frosted goodness to find the “prize inside,” but it makes us forget the one thing that makes each spoonful of sugar-coated affection even better… kickass box art!
(Post Cereals, ?)
The cereal so spooky it doesn’t exist. Seriously, I looked online for hours trying to find a decent photo of this box and came up with nadda. I did find out that at one point Casper, The Friendly Ghost was their mascot but apparently the product dates back much, much further than that. Spooky.
Not quite creepy, but not really cute, these corporate snot boogers are what will happen to Troma if they keep remaking films (I’m looking at you Darren Lynn Bousman). The punchline is that this product was co-branded by Purina… yes, the people who make dog food.
|#8 Sugar Krinkles
(Post Cereals, 1950)
The kids growing up in the 1950s must have been fearless to eat these clown infested crunchies. I mean just look at that box cover and tell me that doesn’t eeriely foreshadow Stephen King’s Pennywise.
I’d be remiss to say that Steve Urkel is necessarily “cool,” but you have to admit that anyone as awkward as Steve who can make it onto a cereal box is doing something right. Ever see a Pee-Wee Herman cereal? I didn’t think so.
Don’t you think that Gizmo is adorable? Why not take a bite out of him… or at least a spoonful of mini-Gizmos. Just don’t consume this after midnight.
|#5 E.T. Cereal
(General Mills, 1984)
E.T. is just pretty wicked looking anyway, but add in a special cameo by Michael Jackson and its pure gold! With no sugar, though, the taste was just about as alien as E.T. himself.
|#4 Addams Family
They’re creepy and they’re kooky… but tasty? Only if you like your cereal with extra syrup. Actually, why not just take a swig or two from Aunt Jemima and be done with it.
|#3 WWF Superstars
Feel the pain. No seriously, feel it as those jagged star-shaped puffs scrape your inner gums until they bleed (just like a real wrestler)! The box art featured a variety of top-billed wrestlers, of course my first favorite being the Legion of Doom with Ultimate Warrior a second close.
|#2 Slimer and The Real Ghostbusters
Who you gonna call? Well if you want to boost sales, Slimer. Due to lagging sales, the original Real Ghostbusters cereal was rebranded with Slimer’s mug to increase interest from kids. The coolest things about the box? It glowed in the dark. Sweet!
|#1 Count Chocula
(General Mills, 1971)
The crème de la crème of cereal box covers, Count Chocula is the original monster cereal and though I wish I could include all of the monster cereals, the Count simply has them beat with this one cover. Despite Frankenberry receiving a similar sinister cover treatment, Chocula’s box art is unmistakingly Bela Lugosi and was far more controversial with its inclusion of the “Jewish” star pendant. Cereal, cinema and controversy? It doesn’t get any better than that.
What are some of your favorites?